Misra Family Hebdomadal: Baby Jacy!

Attention World!

Jacy May Misra was born last Thursday morning, March 19th 2015 at 3:10am! She was a whopping 6 pounds, 15 ounces and was 19 inches long - and 100% perfect!

That's right, Jacy just couldn't wait to get here and came 13 DAYS early! The doctors didn't say anything at all as to why this happened - only that it happens sometimes. We're thinking it was Luke's fault. In the couple of days leading up to this grand event he had taken it upon himself to go up to Marinda's belly and say things like "Time to come out Jacy! Come out baby!" We guess that she heard him.

The story actually begins on Tuesday night. Marinda was teaching harp to her last two students, a mother daughter back to back lesson, and she noticed something that felt a lot like a contraction. And then another, and another. Apparently sitting on a piano bench for two hours isn't that great for the whole not having contractions thing.

She ended up ending the lesson half an hour early because they were hurting, And had Amit start clocking them. They were every five minutes, lasting over a minute, and were like that for over an hour. That's the formula, so we packed up our sleeping little boy and headed over to Seattle.

At least that was the plan.

You see, Marinda was originally freaking out about having to drive across the 520 bridge. She had had a friend who had her baby on the side of the freeway about a year before, and she was having anxiety (to put it mildly) about having to drive more than five minutes to the hospital. Yes, she was spoiled when she had Luke living right next to the hospital. But after living in Bellevue for two months and seeing that it only took 15-25 minutes to get to the hospital, she was feeling better about it.

So OF COURSE there had to be an accident on the 520 bridge that closed all lanes the night they were going to go to the hospital, making them having to take the long away around on 90 and then on 5 - a good forty-five minute drive even at that time of night. (side note: Amit says it was not a 45 minute drive. Maybe more like 30 min. 35 tops)

We got there, and Marinda was feeling really great. Sure her contractions hurt, but she could still move through them. She was even doing a good job of not getting her hopes up. You see, nothing is as disappointing as going to the hospital thinking that you're going to have your baby and then being sent home. So Marinda was emotionally protecting herself - that is until the doctor came in to examine her and without thinking said "I feel hair!"

Marinda's response:

"WHAT?!?"

The doctor was so surprised she doubled checked to make sure that Marinda's water hadn't broken. It hadn't, but it was so ridiculously thin that the doctor could feel everything through it. Marinda was elated - she was going to have her baby that night!

So much for not getting your hopes up.

Foolish Girl! You just THINK you're having your baby!
You look WAY too much like a human to actually be in labor!

Marinda and Amit were then instructed to go walk the hospital for the next two hours, sure that with a bit of exercise her contractions would pick up the pace or maybe even get that water to break. (Note: Marinda went into labor last time when she napped for an entire day, exercise seems to slow things down. Evolution wise it makes way more sense to go into labor when your body thinks that it is fine and resting, not when your being chased by a lion.) Marinda was so motivated, she marched up and down stairs, endless circles on the abandoned floors (while Amit slept in a chair - he was so exhausted and we needed one of us thinking straight), and even kept walking while eating a snack from the all night snack cart. By the end, she was exhausted - and her contractions had slowed down.

They sent her home.

"I was so depressed and humiliated," Marinda said about it later. "I knew not to get my hopes up, but I did anyway." All Marinda wanted to do was crawl into her bed and never come out again. 100 points Amit for not complaining about a wasted evening or being tired, because Marinda probably would have jumped off the 90 bridge while they were driving over it - in case you still missed the whole "being sent home sucks" thing.

The next morning Marinda was still having infrequent contractions, but she took a solemn vow that she wouldn't be led astray again. The hospital told her to come back if her contractions were 3 minutes apart or if her water broke - and honestly at this point Marinda was so bitter that she decided that she wasn't going to go back unless she was suddenly covered in amniotic fluid. She even looked up how to have an emergency home birth - positive that she was going to have to deliver at home because those stupid doctors had sent her away. (Yes, she was being absolutely ridiculous. We are very aware of that.)

Marinda honestly couldn't say what her contractions were doing all day, because she was purposefully ignoring them. She spent the day talking to friends and family about what happened the night before, and after several people telling her that it was ok, she began to believe them. But not enough to actually, you know, do the responsible thing and track them. She even went visiting teaching that night (against Amit's wishes) because she was soooo positive that she wasn't in labor. She noticed that she had five in the hour she was at starbucks visiting with the two other sisters from her church, but that was still 12 minutes apart. She was soooooo not in labor - even though they were strong enough now that she had to think about not thinking about them.

At this point we're going to switch gears and give you an update as to how she was progressing hour by hour.

8-11pm: When Marinda got home, she talked to her friend Kamie Bushman who had just had her baby a month ago. Marinda had read her birth story that day, and wanted Kamie to tell her how in the world she did it. Marinda had been dealing with feeling frankly terrified of going through labor again, and Kamie's story was all about learning how to work through your fear and have a labor free of all the negative things that had been plaguing her for months. "After reading her birth story," Marinda said later when asked, "I just wanted to shout 'That's what I want! I want to not be afraid any more!'" You should all read her birth story; it was inspiring.

So after conquering all of Marinda's fears and concerns and coming up with a plan that actually made Marinda feel confident, Marinda started to say good-bye - and had to stop. She had her first contraction that she couldn't talk through. "Stupid contraction," Marinda thought, "but I'm not in labor, so it is nothing to worry about."

11-12:30am: Marinda went and found Amit to tell him about her new plan to get through labor, and off handedly asked him to clock her contractions. They were 4 minutes apart. The hospital said to go in when they were 3 minutes apart. Plus it was late - and Marinda and Amit didn't want to go to the hospital in the middle of the night and wake up Luke and all their friends again (note: no matter how great of friends you have or how much you prepare, going to the hospital in the middle of the night when you have a toddler is a pain.) Marinda was convinced that if she just laid down and went to bed that the contractions would slow down and stop like they did the night before. She just needed to concentrate on relaxing...

Marinda had Amit clock her contractions after lying down, and low and behold they had slowed down to 5 minutes apart, just like she knew they would. Feeling confident that nothing was going to happen that night, Amit went to sleep and Marinda concentrated on not thinking about her contractions. She even managed to get some sleep in-between, but they kept getting stronger and stronger. But they weren't getting closer together! They said to worry when they were 3 minutes apart so obviously she wasn't in labor!

Then the contractions changed. They still stayed far apart, but Marinda couldn't breath through them. And then it hit her: She had felt these type of contractions before. These were Active Labor contractions. These were real. But a part of her held onto the belief that if she could breath through them for a bit longer then they would calm down and go away.

12:30-1:30am: Marinda woke up Amit to tell him that she needed help breathing through her contractions. You know, just for a little bit until they calmed down. Note: they were still 5 minutes apart. After a couple of these, Marinda got up to use the bathroom - and all insanity exploded. The pain levels went up about ten notches and they started coming RIGHT after each other. Marinda turned to Amit and said "We need to go to the hospital - NOW."

She didn't care anymore if they sent her home. If going to the hospital would tempt fate and make these contractions go away, then she was fine with that if it got them to stop - but we think that maybe a more responsible part of her brain also knew that despite how negative she was feeling about going to the hospital that it was the right thing to do.

She considered waiting and clocking the contractions for ten or so minutes so she could tell the nurse how often they were coming, until the next one hit her - then she decided to just call. She told the nurse that she couldn't breath or move through the them, and the nurse said in a perky, upbeat voice to come on in!

Marinda got dressed as fast as her now very close and very painful contraptions would let her while Amit got Luke up and in the car. She kept her cool, but couldn't figure out why Amit wasn't running. And then when he stopped to take the trashcans to the curb for garbage day the next morning, she wanted to scream at him. (Side note: we were all really grateful we didn't have two weeks of garbage piled up in our garage by the next week. Smart thinking daddy!)

Once they got in the car and were able to start clocking the contractions, things got very real, very fast. They were 2 minutes apart. How did they progress so fast?!?

1:30-2am: The bridge was open tonight (thank goodness) and we threw Luke out the door at our friend's house (ok, Amit walked him to the door) and then rushed over to the hospital. Marinda was doing a good job getting through the contractions - focusing on not thinking, if that makes any sense - but you could still tell that they were really intense now. Amit parked the car in front of the hospital, left his hazards on, and ran inside to get a wheel chair with Marinda managing to walk a few steps in-between contractions.

They got up to labor and deliver, and their nurse was right there to greet them. Low and behold it was the same nurse who had taken care of Marinda last week when she was in there for her fall! That was a nice surprise, since they already knew each other and Marinda knew that she liked her. (Her name was Natalie by the way.) They got to the examination room and Marinda curled up on the examination bed, feeling terrible and probably looking it.

The doctor walked in (it was the same doctor who saw her the night before) and Marinda managed to say "I think something's different" and the doctor just smiled and said "yes, something looks very different." (Remember that picture of her being all smily the night before?) The doctor checked Marinda, said she was at a 5 (she was at a 4 last night), then told Natalie to move Marinda to the other room. While Natalie was unhooking the fetal monitors Marinda looked up at her and asked "am I being admitted?" To which Natilie looked confused, then smiled and said "Yes, you are."

This was it. Jacy was coming! Even with everything that she was going through, Marinda still didn't believe that they were going to admit her until they actually said the words.

2-2:30am: Natilie got a wheel chair to help Marinda get the whole ten yards down the hall to the labor and delivery room, but even with how short of a trip it was Marinda made her stop twice during her contractions. When they were about three feet from the door Marinda suddenly felt sick, but managed to throw up in the trashcan by the door inside her room. And she kept throwing up. Oh the joys of labor...

When it finally stopped, she turned to Amit and said "You must think I'm the most disgusting creature alive." To which one of the other nurses said "No way! You are beautiful and strong and amazing!" Then all three nurses turned to Amit (probably with a death stare) and he said "No way! I've seen you throw up before, you're doing great!" Good job Amit. :)

Now, when Marinda had been wheeled in the first thing she had said between throwing up was "Epidural? Please?" You see, with Luke it had been a very busy night and there was a long waiting list, but this time it was just Marinda and one other person laboring, so there was no wait! All she had to do was get her IV in and the anistigioligist would be there! Plus, she was only at a 5, so obviously she had HOURS to go. Plenty of time to get those pain meds in her!

So there was Marinda, forcing herself into zombi mode every two minutes, with Amit's hand on her forehead and moving his face into her line of sight. He really was great, encouraging her and reminding her of her positive affirmation statements she had made, what, two hours before? Good thing Marinda talked to him about her new plan instead of waiting until the morning!

Then Marinda had a contraction that felt very different. Instead of just being a pain in her lower abdomen, there was a pressure - and then a pop. The best way to describe it is that it is like a balloon under a faucet that got filled too full and the bottom bursts open. You see, with Luke, Marinda never actually felt her water break. This time, though, it was just like everyone described - like a huge gush of fluid.

And her pain levels sky rocketed. All sorts of other more colorful phrases might be more accurate to describe how bad this sudden change in pain was, but they aren't exactly family friendly.

Marinda turned to Amit and Natilie to tell them what happened, but only managed to say "GUSH!" (Amit claims it actually sounded more like "uuuuuuu") and they said "What?" So Marinda sucked in enough air to be heard and said "Water!" Amit and Natilie looked at each other confused and ask "You'd like a drink of water?" To which Marinda eloquently responded "NO!"

2:30-3am: It may have only been a few more minutes, but Marinda will claim to the other side of the moon and back that it was hours before the anesthesiologist came. His name was Michael, and was really nice, but also asked Marinda to sit on the edge of the bed - which made him evil. Now, Marinda knew that she was going to have to do this, but her contractions were so bad that her entire body was shaking and she didn't need to concentrate anymore to become a vegetable - her brain wasn't exactly processing through the pain very well. But, somehow, she got sitting up, and the doctor's attendee came in to watch (it was actually a resident who put it in, which is fine. They know what they're doing or they wouldn't be allowed to do it) and she kept asking Marinda to straighten her back, or shift her shoulders to help putting the epidural in easier. And Marinda just sat there. She literally could not move. Natilie at one point helped by tilting the bed slightly to help with the angle, but it literally took f-o-r-e-v-e-r.

Naitlie tried to get Marinda to breath through the contractions by telling her to make a low "oooo" sound when she breathed out. Amit said Marinda then made a noise more like a "eeeekee" that was anything but low, but Naitlie still said she did a great job! Amit apparently thought this was funny or something - which now that we're not in the middle of labor actually maybe was. (Side note: Amit claims this paragraph happened pre-epidural, but what does he know? So what if he was *slightly* more coherent during all of this?)

Once the epidural was in, Marinda vision got less fuzzy, and after a few minutes she could feel the tingling in her feet - but the pain didn't go away! With Luke the epidural had worked instantly, so when it was in and flowing and she had even pressed the button for an extra shot and it STILL wasn't making the pain any less, Marinda started to get worried - to put in a g-rated terms.

Natilie helped her lay on her side and told her that it just needed a few more minutes that Marinda had progressed so fast that the meds were playing catch up with her system, but Marinda was suddenly changing her perspective on life, the universe and everything - and it involved her being tortured until the end of time. Michael even gave her an extra dose to try and make it work faster - because Marinda was, well, suffering, but she still felt no relief. She had barried her face into a towel that was on her bed for some reason, and the texture and darkness seemed to make it more bearable, but she still started muttering "Why isn't it working?!?" over and over again.

Strangely enough, this was also the point where for the first time since they had gotten into her room she started having coherent thoughts.

Before Marinda was able to empty her mind during her contractions, kind of a reverse concentration, but now she didn't have that sort of control. Before she was able to rest between contractions - like sinking into a hot tub after a workout and feeling so blissfully relaxed, but now there was no rest - only pain and a whole lot more pain. So her mind began to think things on its own.

The first thought it wanted to go to was "I'm going to die," but Marinda somehow managed to mentally slap herself and keep herself from thinking that thought. Instead she thought "We're NEVER having any more kids! I'm NEVER doing this to myself again! WHY IN THE WORLD did I agree to go through this again in the first place!" which eventually transistioned to the great philosophical discussion of "Why isn't the epidural working?!?!" and eventually settled on "This is a nightmare. This is just a bad dream. I'm going to wake up soon, and it will be over." Continuing with the strangeness factor, this last thought was actually the one that gave her the most peace.

Then something changed again, and Marinda managed to breath out "She's pushing me!" To which the world's two worsts code interpreters responded with "the nurse is pushing on you?" To which Marinda said "NO! She wants to come out!" (Note: Marinda loves Amit, she really does, but she was really frustrated at him at this point.) Natilie then called the doctor and said "She says that she thinks she feels pushing. You should probably come and check her again."

Marinda wanted to yell at her. How could she doubt that Marinda was feeling like the baby was pushing? Isn't that a red flag when the mom says "I feel pushing?" What was the problem? They had been there for hours, so why would it be so surprising that she felt like it was time to push?

The doctor came in, and checked Marinda out. Marinda was axysious to hear how close she was, but her doctor just kept saying "she's complete complete." The doctor then came over to Marinda and told her with a soft, soothing voice that she was "complete complete" and Marinda asked what that meant. The doctor smiled at her and said "It means that you're at a 10. You can start pushing now."

Marinda couldn't believe it. The pain was still so intense, but she was at a 10? She had made it to 10 cm without a epidural? Everything changed for Marinda at that point, her view on herself and the world and what she thought was possible, but all she managed to say was "It's over?"

And just like that the epidural finally kicked in and the pain disappeared.

Marinda looked at the clock. It was 3am. It hadn't been hours. She had gone from a 5 to a 10 in ONE hour - and she had done it all by herself.

3-3:10am: The last ten minutes were like a dream. Marinda had no pain, she was ready to push, and suddenly there was nothing standing in the way between her and her daughter. "It felt I was at the end of a long hallway," she said about the experience later, "and I could see her at the end of it. And I just started running." Marinda was so excited, she started laughing and crying. She couldn't feel the contractions or anything, but she didn't care. She wanted to keep pushing even in-between contractions - that's how excited she was to finally meet her!

In three pushes, Jacy May Misra officially entered the world at 3:10am on March 19th, 2015. She gave a little cry, just to say "hey guys! I'm here!" and then went right to sleep in Marinda's arms. Amit opted to cut the cord this time, and was elated that his daughter was finally here. "It was amazing being able to watch her come out, seeing her head full of hair, her scrunched-up little face. And so fast! Luke took forever to come out, but Jacy was a champ. And I was so proud of Marinda for doing it and not giving up."

And she was perfect. Soft, smooth baby skin - long, beautiful fingers - amazing blue/brown eyes and a smooshed left ear that looked kind of elfish. After so many months, she was here, and was the loveliest thing we had ever seen.

Our beautiful girl! And 13 days early!

The rock star of the hour!
Marinda said later that though she never wanted to do it again, getting to a 10 by herself
kind of made her want to stand on a boulder out in the mountains somewhere and yell
"I AM WOMAN!"
Her doctors say she can totally count this as a natural childbirth, which still just dazzles Marinda that she really did do it!

One proud dad and one very sleepy baby

Is it just us, or does Jacy look like she's being translated with how bright she ie?

Oh little girl, you have no idea yet how good of a dad you got.

Road to Recovery: Marinda had tested positive for Group B Strep, which is a nasty thing that Jacy could catch on the way out of Marinda. But not to worry, it is very easy to treat - all you need to do is make sure the mom has four hours of antibiotic IV in her right before the baby comes out!

Oh wait, Marinda was only in the hospital for one hour before Jacy came out. What that meant is that instead of the normal 24 hours in the hospital, Marinda and Jacy had to stay in the hospital for 48 hours, just to make sure Jacy wasn't getting sick.

Marinda was fine with that. An extra 24 hours of help from the nurses and a bed that could sit up on its own - yes please! And Luke was all set to spend the next two nights at friend's houses so Amit could stay with Marinda. This was going to be great! (Clearly Marinda was still doped up on endorphins at this point...)

Jacy also initially had trouble regulating her body temperature, so she had to go under the fry warmer for a bit. We made jokes that it was the one and only time she would ever need to go tanning. Then once we got to our recovery room they just insisted that Marinda snuggle with her skin to skin. Oh no! What horrible torture! :) After about six hours she was fine - clearly she just wanted to snuggle with her Mommy for a bit!

Another side comment: Amit and Marinda felt so different on their way to the recovery room than they had with Luke. With Luke it was like "What?! They're just going to leave us alone with him?" This time Marinda turned to Amit in her wheelchair and said "Isn't it nice that we have some idea of what we're doing this time?"

Luke came to visit that afternoon and it really cute in it's own sort of way. Amit and Marinda had been prepping him for months to meet his little sister, so they were curious to see how he would react when confronted with the actual baby. So what did Luke do when he saw her? He took a look, then curled up next to Marinda and promptly feel asleep! That's ok, they have lots of time to bond.

Our two babies :)

That's not a baby, that's a Jacy baby!

Our precious little angel!

When he woke up he got to get a special Big Brother Cookie from the "hospital resurant," and Amit took him home to give him a bath before taking him over to the sitter.

And then... Luke threw up.

We had no idea if he was actually sick or if it was just having to be woken up in the middle of the night two nights in a row, but Marinda and Amit decided to do the responsible thing and have Amit stay at home with Luke. Marinda had a ton of nurses who could help her out, and maybe Luke would be feeling better tomorrow. Yay for being adults.

At first everything was fine - Jacy was eating more, Marinda was vegging out, Luke had gone to sleep early and Amit was able to get some things done that we hadn't had time to do (because we thought we still have two more weeks to get ready or something) and then Marinda hit the 24 hour from labor mark...

Now Marinda knew this was coming. When she hit this mark after Luke she was literally unable to move more than her fingers for about six hours just from the strain that labor had put on her body. Her nurse tried to make her more comfortable and even babysat Jacy for a while so Marinda could sleep, but man, Marinda felt like road kill from about 1am to 4am. Much better than last time, but Marinda only got about two hours of sleep that night.

Then the next day happened... If you think that hospitals are great places to get some rest think again. Between pediatrians, OBs, social workers, nurses taking vitals, lactation consultants, and needing to, you know, eat, Marinda got maybe another hour's worth of rest the next day. It turned out Luke was sick, so Amit had to spend the second night at home too. But hey, Marinda already made it through the 24 hour wall, so tonight she should be able to get more sleep!

Beautiful Girl! One Day Old!

Marinda wanted to play dress up!

Jacy's First Funny Face!

But no - Jacy wanted to be fed like every hour or two, and even though during the day she was fine sleeping for four hours at a time by herself in her cradle, during the night she refused to sleep unless she was being held. The nurse took her out to the nurse's station again so Marinda could get some sleep, but then around 1am Marinda got hit with worst pain than before. The left side of her back just started screaming at her with pain levels up to a 7 (and after going through labor you don't exaggerate pain levels). They even had a doctor come and look at her back, but there was nothing obviously wrong. Concluding that it must have just been more muscle strain from labor, they got a heating pad and Marinda opted to wait it out instead of taking more drugs. By 5am it was manageable and Marinda got about an hour of sleep. So another another sleepless night for Marinda. But hey! She got to watch cartoons all night! Silver lining!

The next day they were finally going to be able to go home - and honestly Marinda was looking forward to it. After being bugged by doctors for two days straight she couldn't wait to actually take a nap (since it looked like Jacy just loved to sleep during the day) and spend some time with her cute little boy. Amit and Luke showed up with flowers for Mommy and a birthday balloon for Jacy, and they were discharged by noon!

There is nothing like coming home as a new family and putting your little girl in her cradle for the first time. All the preparation and wondering suddenly becomes real. You realize that she really is real and that she really is yours, and your life begins fresh and new all over again.